Steven Seagal’s “On Lethal Floor” (1994) is strictly that.
It’s the results of the dependable Warner Brother motion film star getting the prospect to jot down, direct, produce and star in his first post-“Underneath Siege” (1992) ardour challenge.
It opens in Alaska and begins with the shot of a bald eagle, with Ric Waite’s widescreen cinematography and Basil Poledouris’s grand rating highlighting visions of polar bears, mountain vistas and a large oil rig, which is on fireplace.
To this point, so good.
We meet Michael Caine’s vile, corrupt villain named Jennings, who oversees the rig and has employed his prime man to diffuse the inferno. That’s Forrest Taft, performed by Seagal, who enters on the road, “Oh, thank God.”
Seagal clearly can’t direct himself, as his line readings are stiff, however he does know learn how to promote his picture, because the second Taft diffuses the fireplace is established with a shot of an inferno ballooning behind Seagal; he stands in heart body, smiling as every little thing behind him goes increase.
It’s fairly the cash shot.
Later, there’s a bar struggle wherein Seagal stands up for an abused Native American, slowly beating the crap out of character actor Mike Starr and, on the identical time, lecturing him about manners whereas everybody within the crowded bar listens intently and nods approvingly at every little thing Seagal does.
The pool stick battle in “Out for Justice” (1991) was much better, but it surely admittedly lacked the moralizing. Right here, Seagal drops the road, “What does it take, to alter the essence of a person?”
How does one thing like this occur?
While you’re the lead in a handful of vigilante motion automobiles, all with three phrases within the title (save for “Underneath Siege”), and people motion pictures gross excess of the price of the manufacturing, and also you’re declared the following massive motion star, a ardour challenge is presumably proper across the nook.
Make no mistake – though “Underneath Siege” was directed by Andrew Davis (who adopted it up with “The Fugitive” a 12 months later), showcased Tommy Lee Jones and Gary Busey because the central villains and was bought as “Die Exhausting on a ship” (lengthy earlier than “Velocity 2: Cruise Management” tried to stake that declare), it was Seagal who impressed the lengthy traces exterior film theaters on opening weekend.
Seagal had arrived with the shock hit of “Above the Legislation” (1988) however “Underneath Siege” was a blockbuster. That is why Warner Bros. gave the tall, sometimes black-clad, pony-tailed and whisper-voiced Aikido grasp the chance to make a status image like “On Lethal Floor.”
Michael Caine gave backhanded praise to Steven Seagal at On Lethal Floor premiere https://t.co/YZNCwqmvNY pic.twitter.com/ul3ZNSM9Q4
— JoBlo.com (@joblocom) July 8, 2023
This was speculated to be Seagal’s “Billy Jack,” a macho motion flick with a trigger and the model of PC Oscar bait the Academy couldn’t ignore. As a substitute, that is the type of amusing, unselfconscious trash that sports activities the road, “For $350,000.00, I’d f—something as soon as!”
Let it’s said- you in all probability can’t make a film this humorous on goal.
“On Lethal Floor” is unhealthy and was the pace bump from which Seagal’s movie profession by no means fully recovered (not even the inevitable and not-bad “Underneath Siege 2: Darkish Territory” put him again on the A-list).
Nonetheless, so far as ego-centric and misguided star automobiles go, it’s one of many funniest I’ve ever seen.
Seagal’s coronary heart could have been within the right-ish place, however he wanted a director to maintain him centered. Sporting that chef’s hat, serving a muscular script and having much less display time than traditional in “Underneath Siege” and, later, his good cameo in “Government Determination” (his remaining film grace notes) served him properly.
“On Lethal Floor,” then again, is an satisfying ego journey, a self-parody that, bizarrely, performs like “Roadhouse” crossed with “Dances With Wolves.”
With 1994’s On Lethal Floor Steven Seagal Received Lifeless Severe About Ripping Off Billy Jack and its Varied Heavy-Handed Messages — It Turns Out the Naming Rights! Membership Possibility Was For Actual and Somebody Is Now 5 Hundred Bucks Poorer Presents Nat https://t.co/4TlSTckqC0
— John C. McGinley (@JohnCMcGinley) February 7, 2024
The intentions have been noble, as Seagal’s authentic title was “Rainbow Warrior” (!) and the plot depicts an Exxon-Valdez-like oil spill that pollutes the Alaskan wildlife and creates an additional rift between the indigenous individuals residing off the land and the swimsuit and tie snakes who abuse anybody standing of their means.
Seagal understood his standing as a film star, however his appearing is restricted by his self-satisfaction. Much better is Caine, going all in on a movie that wasn’t value his time, and Joan Chen, who tries to inject some character into Masu, a strictly sidekick position with little dialogue.
Nonetheless, Chen now has the Corridor of Fame distinction of getting been directed by David Lynch, Bernardo Bertolucci, Oliver Stone…and Seagal.
A pre-“Sling Blade” Billy Bob Thornton will get in a couple of moments the place he manages some snicker traces which can be intentional. John C. McGinley enhances his each scene with an depth the film by no means matches.
McGinley is a first-rate villain and his bespeckled killer looks like an intentional selection: there’s an overlong torture scene impressed by essentially the most notorious sequence from “RoboCop” (1987). It’s the ugliest scene right here, although the violence is brutal however clumsily staged.
Alternatively, there’s the poor use of gradual movement, a photograph prop of Seagal sporting an embarrassing pink and blue sweater and a hazy, hilarious dream sequence with bare Eskimos, a grizzly bear battle and “Altered States” mysticism, which emerges because the movie’s second largest what-was-he-thinking second.
FAST FACT: ‘On Lethal Floor” earned $38 million on the U.S. field workplace, a far cry from 1992’s “Underneath Siege” – 83 million.
There’s additionally the bit the place Seagal protests, “I don’t need to resort to violence,” then opens a closet with a military’s value of weapons and ammo. It appears like a “Bare Gun” outtake, besides we’re not speculated to be laughing.
To chop Seagal a break- even for a notoriously self-indulgent failure, it’s at all times entertaining.
Sporting a heavy jacket and informed that “the eagle and bear are your spirit guides,” Seagal goes all “Jeremiah Johnson” throughout his second act, looking for extra bones to snap. This turns into a quasi-western, as Seagal even lassos a foul man in the course of the climax!
We’re given a great deal of dialogue about how superior Forest Taft is, in addition to somebody saying Taft’s reappearance by saying “He’s ba-ack,” a la “Poltergeist” (1982). Each time Taft fires a gun, he by no means misses, and his punches at all times make contact.
He even sticks a knife right into a villain’s head!
Chen’s Masu states that her late father, the Chief, could be happy with their work, regardless of how they tag staff killing a whole lot of individuals and inflicting mass destruction to the setting.
No less than the third act provides us R. Lee Ermey because the chief of mercenaries with itchy set off fingers.
Then, when it appeared just like the unhealthy laughs had lastly ceased, we get Seagal’s legendary misstep of a concluding speech, delivered to a crowded auditorium.
Seagal’s prolonged speech from a podium, about alternate gas sources, oil spills and The Land vs. Massive Enterprise, is interspersed with environmental footage (marked by matte work, Inuit throat singing and real Exxon Valdez footage) enjoying behind him and awestruck viewers member response pictures.
Seagal presumably believed this bit would make him an Oscar contender.
Many others have reported this however enable me to verify what you will have heard: when this portion of “On Lethal Floor” unspooled in a movie show, individuals left early. LOTS of individuals. The takeaway: give a hoot, don’t pollute, Forrest Taft is a god amongst males, roll credit.
There have been worse movies launched in 1994 (“Exit to Eden,” “Combined Nuts” and “The Flintstones” come to thoughts), although they lack an oily-haired super-villain declaring “Alaska is a 3rd world nation…only one we occur to personal! Ha ha ha ha!”
To state the plain, “On Lethal Floor” marked a turning level in Seagal’s profession, the primary time Seagal appeared, properly, marked for demise.
The tip credit even have some pleasant nuggets: this was shot in Alaska, L.A., Washington and, sure, that was Bart the Bear in a supporting position!
Whereas there’s the unhappy lack of a Seagal tune on the soundtrack (in contrast to “Marked For Loss of life” and “Fireplace Down Beneath”), the movie makes up for this oversight by concluding with the Seagal/Nassa Productions emblem, which is a shimmering movie reel with a nail pushed by it.
No, I didn’t make that half up.